Monday, November 19, 2012

I've always felt it a shame that my Aunt has without exception been reluctant to have her picture made. She is a woman of delicate grace and strength, always busy serving up life for others in a welcoming way, never calling attention to herself, but always presenting herself in the most elegant of ways. She is gentle and unassuming and a model of southern genteelness and selflessness. I have patterned much of who I desire to be for others in this world after her, as I know many others have. She is a beautiful woman whose charm finds its home in those she is around.

And it is she who shakes my belief that "a picture is worth a thousands words" is true. I recently saw a photograph of Aunt, she who is warmth, hospitality, and grace itself and the photo just wasn't her. How could it be? No voice, no response to the person gazing upon her, no laughter, no sympathy shared. It was then that I realized that though much is gained in photographs, much is simply not present. She, in fact, in the photograph seemed different ... severe even. Not at all a portrait of the woman she is, either physically or spiritually. That causes me to wonder over photographs I have seen of long lost relatives, or people living in a different time than I. I get a visual, but now I know there is an essence of those people that I will never know. It suddenly is a great loss. Though the picture is worth a thousand words, something remains elusive. It seems it takes a living being to convey the soul.

I regret that there are people of great influence in my life whose voice I will never know, or whose natural smile and authentic laughter will never be known to me. Whose presence is lost, a presence that is more than holding a space.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Photographs can capture a moment, can sear the soul. Photographs can propel us to action, touch our soul. And those are invaluable and are as eternal as much as anything of this world ever is. But, to know an individual through a photograph without voice, without warmth, without soul is not possible. That makes me know that we must hear, and feel and truly connect with the people around us as we live.