I HATE it when I see my own stupidity so clearly defined in someone else ... I mean, saying things I have, or at lease could have, said - usually referencing years ago. But, the reality is that I am aware that I may still be stupid, because I know I have been stupid. The bumper sticker "Don't believe everything you think" has become my mantra.

These observations came reeling round to me this morning as I perused my Facebook newsfeed and found a comment referring to the death of Dave Brubeck, a man who lived a remarkably creative life, a genius of the music world, and who lived a "long" 91 years. Of that long and productive life, one young man makes a comment, "Most unfortunate. I actually though [sic] that he had died years ago, however, so I can't say that I'm much bothered. Guy was ancient." Oh, yeah, ancient. Yeah, he "though."

Where shall I begin? Somewhere around my mid-30's, I guess. Because that is when I think I started getting a tiny bit of a clue that maybe what I'd "though" all my life wasn't quite lining up right when I actually "thought" about it. I'm not exactly sure what I was thinking before I started thinking, but when I started really thinking I realized I neither agreed nor ascribed to many of the beliefs and convictions I held as true. I started seeing my convictions as intolerant, insensitive, uninformed, immature, and generally illogical. I was startled by these revelations ... but ultimately very glad for them. Life experiences came round to ground me, soften me, humble me, awaken me. Thank goodness I am who I am now, but wait ... what if I still count as intolerant, insensitive, uninformed, immature, and generally illogical?? Life is a cycle of prayer, reflection, evaluation, and self-examination.

The shift in my thinking messed with my head, literally. I simply had never really thought about what I thought about "things of life." Are you following me here? Such things of life as religion and justice. Things such as the teachings of Jesus that caused me to see that everyone else's life is as of much value to themselves and to God as mine is. Things like the fact that opportunity should exist for everyone ... what they do with it is their decision, but they ought to have the opportunity to take it or leave it. And, things such as knowing that while I had worked and planned and done things like I was "supposed to," it was because of More than my own rightness and goodness that I lived a life called Blessed. 

How do I sum it up. No question mark there because it's a rhetorical question ... not one really being asked or expecting an answer because I don't think there is an answer. Except to say that it has taken these life experiences to dispel my belief that life is richest in youth. That what is called "mellowing" as we age is actually a process of becoming wiser. Hopefully age brings to us a knowledge of what and who is important. It brings to us an understanding of the value that is in life ... of any and every age. Perhaps most of all it brings the undeniable realization that even if we live for 91 years, we have only a very, very short time in this world

Recognizing that there is a chance that we are stupid is the beginning of the greatest wisdom. To say that 91 years old is ancient is an insult, maybe uninformed and unintended, but still an insult. 91 years comes round in a snap of the fingers, in the proverbial blink of an eye. Should we live to the greatest extent life in this world has to offer, we still have such a short, short time at best. At "worst," life ends way too soon. Like snow on delicate begonia blossoms, a very natural event but one we're just not quite ready for.

Here's to the joy of being young, but here's to the joy of being wise ... at any and every age.

This morning I named it: We are holding in trust at out home on Russell Street "Our Menagerie of Misfits." The animals that have come to us through various avenues. Denny the dog was brought in as company for Piper the dog who had moved from the wide open country to a fenced back yard. Piper was losing herself back there in the yard by herself for much of the day, so Denny to the rescue. Denny himself had been being held in trust, having been rescued off the road as a puppy, so it was a perfect complement and solution to our Piper problem. Then Daisy the dog, an adorable and affectionate puppy (... a puppy of the giant sort!) was brought round to us, to be held in trust until she could reunite with the one who loves her most. Three dogs in the backyard did not mix well, and Piper began looking lost again. So back to the farm in the country for Piper. Yippy for all!! Thanks to my sister Piper was welcomed back...to be held in trust.

Now Denny and Daisy are in the backyard digging under the fence, making friends with the neighbors and their dogs, crying like lost souls when absent from their humans. No longer is their company of dogs satisfactory. A 24 hour a day human just for Daisy is would make her life complete.

And Meeklo, the former street cat, big snuggy guy with the cute round face is being held in trust at Russell Street, along with his new little companion Ying. Ying is now exiting the kitten stage and is so full of life that the walls can barely contain her.

They all are loved. They all are enjoyed. They all make me laugh. They all make me anxious when I feel that the "enough love to go around" truism is challenged.

In the meantime we are literally giving a home as best we can and celebrating as we hold them in trust. I think they, in the meantime, are holding Frank and me, too ... without even knowing it. Just being themselves. Bless them one and all. Us, too.

When I go to my closet to get dressed I find lots of nice garments, but when I put them together to make an outfit it ends up looking like something I wouldn't choose for myself. How is that possible? I am the person who chose it all to start with!

Turns out some of my best outfits have been from pieces that I never would have bought for myself ... a long pleated wool skirt from my mother's closet, for example. Pieces that come floating into my life that I otherwise might not have given a first consideration, much less a second. Reminds me of some of life's best experiences, the ones we don't choose for ourselves, or that we think miss the mark for what suits us or what we expect. But, there they are, hanging in our closet. Thank goodness.